Wednesday, July 23, 2008
The Work 180
Just when things were terrible, I got help from a fantastic colleague and the project got turned around. I would even say it got fixed. I am now on 4 other projects (3 small, 1 large), and am once again enjoying my work. I consulted throughout the hand-over and I got my wish to exit gracefully. I'm still not convinced this is THE role for me, but I'm committed to sticking it out and improving.
Just when things were terrible, I got help from a fantastic colleague and the project got turned around. I would even say it got fixed. I am now on 4 other projects (3 small, 1 large), and am once again enjoying my work. I consulted throughout the hand-over and I got my wish to exit gracefully. I'm still not convinced this is THE role for me, but I'm committed to sticking it out and improving.
Those Threes
Things happen in 3's... I just know they do.
Last week I got a ticket for having Ghillie off leash ($260). I thought, oh boy here we go. What are my next 2 things in the dreaded bad luck trilogy?
Well... late on Saturday night I saw (what I think was) a very small COCKROACH in my kitchen. It skittered away too fast for me to get it. That would be #2.
Finally last night I get this very awkward phone call that gave me a bit of a shock. I had a call from a girl on one of my hockey teams - the pink team. She called to tell me that due to a team consensus I would not be playing for them this year. Her reason she said was that they wanted someone "full time" who would take them further. I was a little hurt but I will get over it.
After my divorce and breast surgery last year I was very eager to put more into hockey this year. I count on playing for both the pink and red teams to get as much as I can out of Wednesday nights... I even turned down a 3rd team (my neighbour Vivian who lives around the corner from me asked me to play for their team). I have done this for years, playing up to 3 games a night. I prefer it to playing only one game a night. Anyway, I have been with both teams since Day One, so this is sad news for me.
My busy little mind has been wondering what, if anything, I did to piss someone off, and who it was? My friend Jen assured me she knew nothing about it (conversations about it, consensus, nothing), and that said asked me if she could join the red team, to which I said HELLS YA! And any other former pinks are welcome too. We are a bit short-handed on red this season, so their presence on the team will be welcome.
I would just like to stick up for myself a little here. In all the years I played for ALL my teams... I rarely called in sick, and in the last few years I even found my own subs if I knew I had a conflict. I drove people to and from the rink. I made every late game. I subbed whenever asked. I got to the finals many times (including pink in the finals last season). I did whatever it took. And the list goes on in support of my commitment to this team. I guess I couldn't be bothered to mention these things during that awkward phone call. The convo ended kind of lamely with the girl assuring me that she would be calling on me to sub (um, ya, ok... Thanks?).
I assumed the league and teams are for fun and friendship... to be out, active, reconnect, get out of the house, and to do something in the dead of winter in the middle of the week. I always tried my best.
So I will put my all into my other team and not have sour grapes.
This morning I saw that cockroach again and I killed it dead. The curse is over.
Things happen in 3's... I just know they do.
Last week I got a ticket for having Ghillie off leash ($260). I thought, oh boy here we go. What are my next 2 things in the dreaded bad luck trilogy?
Well... late on Saturday night I saw (what I think was) a very small COCKROACH in my kitchen. It skittered away too fast for me to get it. That would be #2.
Finally last night I get this very awkward phone call that gave me a bit of a shock. I had a call from a girl on one of my hockey teams - the pink team. She called to tell me that due to a team consensus I would not be playing for them this year. Her reason she said was that they wanted someone "full time" who would take them further. I was a little hurt but I will get over it.
After my divorce and breast surgery last year I was very eager to put more into hockey this year. I count on playing for both the pink and red teams to get as much as I can out of Wednesday nights... I even turned down a 3rd team (my neighbour Vivian who lives around the corner from me asked me to play for their team). I have done this for years, playing up to 3 games a night. I prefer it to playing only one game a night. Anyway, I have been with both teams since Day One, so this is sad news for me.
My busy little mind has been wondering what, if anything, I did to piss someone off, and who it was? My friend Jen assured me she knew nothing about it (conversations about it, consensus, nothing), and that said asked me if she could join the red team, to which I said HELLS YA! And any other former pinks are welcome too. We are a bit short-handed on red this season, so their presence on the team will be welcome.
I would just like to stick up for myself a little here. In all the years I played for ALL my teams... I rarely called in sick, and in the last few years I even found my own subs if I knew I had a conflict. I drove people to and from the rink. I made every late game. I subbed whenever asked. I got to the finals many times (including pink in the finals last season). I did whatever it took. And the list goes on in support of my commitment to this team. I guess I couldn't be bothered to mention these things during that awkward phone call. The convo ended kind of lamely with the girl assuring me that she would be calling on me to sub (um, ya, ok... Thanks?).
I assumed the league and teams are for fun and friendship... to be out, active, reconnect, get out of the house, and to do something in the dead of winter in the middle of the week. I always tried my best.
So I will put my all into my other team and not have sour grapes.
This morning I saw that cockroach again and I killed it dead. The curse is over.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Everything Else
I can't stand my job, I am losing my mind. I am so... hating it that I cannot even write here. I have had amazing things to write about: Freezer Burn, Pride, people, places, things, shit that I did, junk that I saw... but I can't, because I can't think about anything except how my job is terrifying. It's so off the rails, so awful. I thought this job would be a good change and a challenge but it has not worked out and I am feeling alienated from colleagues. It's kind of clear that I didn't exactly personally fuck it up, just that by the time I started to escalate things the project was starting to have to meet serious deadlines. My boss has been pretty good about it and has told me, #1, stop taking it personally.
I am trying to turn it around but I dread going in most days. I am serious about either finding another role or exiting gracefully. At least I got myself off the project but I don't know how long this reprieve will last based on secret information I was given. Yes, secret information was given! At least I don't have to "fix" this. Although I do hold a lot of information in my brain, and have been to dozens of meetings (mostly about meetings), I am not the one who has to fix this. That's for people who make more money.
I can't stand my job, I am losing my mind. I am so... hating it that I cannot even write here. I have had amazing things to write about: Freezer Burn, Pride, people, places, things, shit that I did, junk that I saw... but I can't, because I can't think about anything except how my job is terrifying. It's so off the rails, so awful. I thought this job would be a good change and a challenge but it has not worked out and I am feeling alienated from colleagues. It's kind of clear that I didn't exactly personally fuck it up, just that by the time I started to escalate things the project was starting to have to meet serious deadlines. My boss has been pretty good about it and has told me, #1, stop taking it personally.
I am trying to turn it around but I dread going in most days. I am serious about either finding another role or exiting gracefully. At least I got myself off the project but I don't know how long this reprieve will last based on secret information I was given. Yes, secret information was given! At least I don't have to "fix" this. Although I do hold a lot of information in my brain, and have been to dozens of meetings (mostly about meetings), I am not the one who has to fix this. That's for people who make more money.
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
A Blog Cometh
Yes. I know. It's been a while. My job has been poo lately and the stress has been making me exit straight to bed at night without a little diddling on the keyboard (um, what?). The job poo makes me do things like not sit around and spin tales and write and be funny. So I literally need to look back in my the various calendars and see what I've been doing and how it made me feel and all the little funninesses along the way.
Yes. I know. It's been a while. My job has been poo lately and the stress has been making me exit straight to bed at night without a little diddling on the keyboard (um, what?). The job poo makes me do things like not sit around and spin tales and write and be funny. So I literally need to look back in my the various calendars and see what I've been doing and how it made me feel and all the little funninesses along the way.
