Go Betty

10 1/2 Boobs Walking

I have plotted one walk on Google Earth. Since it is largely in the ravines I could not use a traditional map. I was taken on this walk last year and have tried to recreate it from memory. We should attempt this walk a few times this summer. This walk is approximately 4 hours, 24km.

Park in South Forest Hill neighbourhood near the entrance to Cedarvale Park – Around Eglinton Avenue West near the Allen, Everden Rd., Strathean Rd., Ava Rd.

1. Enter Cedarvale Park at the North entrance. Don’t forget to STRETCH!!! Follow the path. You will cross under some bridges including, Bathurst St.

2. Exit Cedarvale Park at the South entrance near the St. Clair West Subway on Tichester Road. Walk east on Tichester (turn left). It becomes Heath Street West. Cross Avenue Road (be careful!). Walk all the way to Yonge Street.

3. Take a pee / rest / stretch at Yonge Street & Heath (there is a Starbucks). Continue east on Heath St. E. to the end; enter David A. Balfour Park.

4. Walk S-E all the way down David A. Balfour Park to the end at Mount Pleasant Road. Be careful crossing Mount Pleasant Road (at the bottom of the dip).

5. Enter Park Drive Reservation Lands leg (bottom of Rosedale ravine-lands). Follow the path as it loops up to Bayview Ave; link up with Brickworks path.

6. On the Brickworks leg follow the woodsy path; it starts looping back N-W. This will end at Moore Ave.

7. Cross Moore (careful!) and enter the south entrance of Mount Pleasant Cemetery.
Walk through the cemetery and head up to the N-W side to catch the Beltline (there are toilets in the cemetery).

8. Follow the Beltline west all the way to the end at Allen Rd. This is the longest, straightest leg of the walk. You are now approximately 3 blocks north of where you started.

Alternatively for steps 2, 3, 4 (this way includes some nice roads, homes, etc.)…

2. From Heath St. West turn right (S) at Russell Hill Road; turn right at Boulton (S), continue down to MacPherson, turn left on MacPherson (W) and walk to Avenue Road. Walk south a wee bit and cross Avenue Road (be careful!); continue west on Roxborough.

3. Take a pee / rest / stretch at Yonge Street (there is a Starbucks at Roxborough).

4. Follow Roxborough St. W. to the end and pick up the end of David A. Balfour Park / beginning of Park Drive Reservation Lands.

When walking:

- no dogs allowed in cemeteries
- wear the shoes you plan to wear on the actual weekend (you should have two pairs of properly-fitted shoes on-the-go so that you don’t wear one pair out practicing)
- wear the type of clothing you plan to wear on the actual weekend (some people swear by synthetic fibre running gear; I wear cotton t-shirts and running shorts; just be comfortable and beware chafing)
- buy the double layer walking socks from The Running Room (prevents blisters)
- wear your fanny pack on practice walks (the kind that holds a water bottle is great)
- bring water (duh!) or sports drink; there are fountains en route to replenish
- pack an energy bar or something like that; eat it en route, about halfway! You will need it!
- take rests every 30 mins or so
- take an advil the night before a walk; take an advil the morning of a walk (THIS IS A GREAT TIP; YOU WILL THANK ME!!)
- have a bath the night after a walk and use Epsom salts (they really, really work!!!)

Things Happen in 3's

This morning I forgot my security card in my other purse; then when trying to count the hours until my next pills I got distracted and brought in a bag of dirty clothes to the office (bound for the dry cleaner). Now I see that I have headphones and no iPod. I don't want to listen to Air Supply.

I have NEW meds to try as of this morning, after the doctor roughly manhandled my lower back making me yelp and then my eyes watered, causing her to say, yes, it seems to have traveled to your kidney. I no longer have a fever but do feel stupid and sluggish. FUCKING BLADDER INFECTION.

The Bladder She is Angry

Too much stress, going out, alcohol, late nights, home renos, not to mention work = a bladder infection, right on time, about every 6 months as I recall. This actually started on Friday but due to managing my time well and sleeping in the day I went out every night anyway. My feet are SCREAMING from heels, dancing, running around... And now the pee problem won't be ignored. I had a script ready and so now am coming through it even though it was a pretty bad one. The dog got a bath today and will finally be walked later around 5:30. That's all I've done.

The Best

The best was when she took her little baby-fisties covered in meat pie and then wiped them on my black jersey wrap dress'd thigh with what I can only describe as much determination and purpose. Had she been able to reach my hair... well, you know. She wanted to deface me a little, take me down a notch. Babies know.

Have a Happy Day, Even if You Didn't Have a Birthday

Uncle Bobby is dead.

I've spoken here before about about "Uncle Bill", with some results!

But what about "The Party Game"? And "The Trouble with Tracy"?

On Hooking Up and Ummm, Being a Mom

Motherhood. I just feel I need to go through it with someone. Need a partner. I am sick of having to always rely on myself and do everything myself. I'm convinced that no one is strong enough for me, no one is patient enough for me, and very few people understand me (I can be a fucking handful). And you know what? I don't even feel that I could guarantee to someone that we'd be together forever. You think you can, but reality is that people break up. Sure I'd get married again but... knowing what I know now I would be reticent to say yes to someone. I don't want to put another human through... me. And it takes so much energy to stick up for yourself and say "enough" when you need to hit the bricks.

And on the random hookups. You know, someone just to hold the door open would be nice, never mind someone with whom to lock eyes in that moment of pure joy over your shaky, bloody knees whilst just having given birth. Basically at this point I'd have sex with a mop, and I'd even buy it breakfast, just to feel something.

Things That Go Bump in the Night

Me, Toni and Dawson have been keeping the power tamper in my front hall at night. Last night around 10pm I was walking around in the dark and I went to lock the front door. I walked right into this rather large piece of gas-powered machinery. It completely took me out. I fell ON MY HEAD in the hall, crashing into the front door and toppling the tamper. I just laughed and laughed. I wasn't hurt at all but it was kind of funny. No need to lock the door, robbers will just trip over the tamper.

When Someone's Pouring Their Heart Out, Don't Try to Top It

On the weekend I was with my brother, sister, her kids family having a bbq in London. My cousin Erin was there too. She's about my sister's age. She's an alcoholic and was telling a pretty difficult story about a relapse. This was over lunch and we were all listening quietly. Then my brother (I'm sure I've described Peter here before; "intellectual disability" as they say; "slow" as is really more to the point) interrupted her and proceeded to describe in detail every alcohol drink he's ever had ("...and I had Jack Daniels. And one time I had a screw driver. Sometimes I have a beer...!"). You just have to laugh it off. His idea of joining a conversation is to interrupt and then have a brain dump of word associations. Actually we killed ourselves laughing. But it's like when the kids say something funny or the dog does something cute. Or the older brother does something awkward...

Demo'd

Me, Toni and Dawson demolished the front yard on Saturday. We had a dumpster and everything. We are so freakin' tough! Dawson even owns a crowbar!

Yes, I left to get coffee and when I came back all the fence and railway ties were in the dumpster and the girls were tearing up the yard! They took out all the weirdness at the side of the house and moved all the soil around - drainage problems solved! THEN we went down into my basement and cleaned that fucker OUT! I have an empty-ass basement now! We filled that dumpster UP!

Then the dumpster man didn't come and collect it at the end of the day, so my neighbours started to fling their crap in there too. And in the middle of the night some clearly drunk and / or short neighbours tried to throw some old doors in there but couldn't reach. So handily, they left it in my front yard. CLASSIC! I got some dog park mates to heave it in for me. I hope the man comes and collects the dumpster today. I don't want anymore dumping in my yard.

...And I Think, Please, You Are SUCH a DOUCHE

Not too many people get my back up. Why is it that sometimes the people you love the most, want the most, also are the most crazy-making? Is it that fine line between passion and literally wanting to throttle the person? How can it be less murderous and just as passionate, I ask you?

Last night I was laughing until I cried at The Pilot. This guy I work with has the ability to remember funny things I've said (cuz I don't remember a thing I've EVER said) and then throw them into conversation like it's the very first time. I'm just easy, having fun, not serious, not looking for Osama bin Laden at the bottom of my beer glass. It's starting off as a nice night.

But then one of those someones calls and suddenly I feel sick, butterflies, feverish, angry, hopeful. Why does that small interjection of that person make me feel so unloved.

And I think, please, you are SUCH and DOUCHE. PLEASE stop calling. But if they did, I'd be nowhere. A consolation prize that no one will ever claim.

Like That TV Show

I finally, finally sat down and watched some TV last night around 10pm. It coincided with something else I never do, which is to grocery shop (fridge usually contains champagne, Guinness, and something vegetative, scary and moldy in a drawer). Last night I shopped and by the time I got everything home and then cooked (!) supper it was 10pm. How on earth do parents do it? Anyway, I was pleasantly surprised to see that Lost was on. Hooray! I had no idea. I just read somewhere that there are only 48 more epsiodes going to be created so the show hopefully will conclude gracefully and loose ends will be tied up.

So Locke is sort of like a rogue bad guy now? Why did all the Others leave Othertown and make a campsite in the jungle? Is Kate pregnant by Sawyer? Why has Ben lost power over the Others? And what was that song playing in the VW van (the one Hurley started a few episodes ago)?

Our beach friends still neglect to speak to each other much... they could really use facebook, or at least the internet.

Please pass me a can of cold Dharma Initative beer... Mmmmm.

Ghillie and Daisy at Sunnybrook

My neighbours had Ghillie this weekend whilst I was at Niagara-on-the-Lake.

Cat, You Are Super High!

If I Had to Nail It, I'd Say...

I am gardening and landscaping and having a grand old time. Could I do this for a living? Hell no. I'm intense and laid back at the same time. I'm shy and yet insanely brave too. I have lots of interests and perhaps sometimes don't finish things. I'm pathetically reliable and helpful, and somewhat thoughtful. I can be pretty intelligent but totally stupid too. I need LOTS of time to process. I don't always get things the first time around. I tend to make some things really complicated, and oversimplify everything else. I'm full of the crazy personality quirks, some downright irritating qualities and yet consider myself a sort of a catch? I move fast. I'm excessively easy to read, no mysteries here. But sometimes not so easily understood. I do battle between my hard logistical tendences and my artistic side. I don't know where i'm headed most of the time. I am meticulous. But I can often let go of the details. I fucking love to laugh. I am provocative. Some very generous people have said a cross between Kate Winslet and Drew Barrymore. But maybe in reality more like a cross between Ellen and the anorexic girfriend...

John Stiles, More Than Meets the Eye

Letter sent to Jian Ghomeshi (host of Q) today:

Hi Jian, I have had people calling me all day about the John Stiles interview. John and I had a sexual encounter in Halifax back in the late 80's when I went to Dal and John went to King's College. We had a tryst in his dorm room. He had had his wisdom teeth out and they were sitting on his dresser and I confess, I took one as a souvenir. Then years later after he had lived in a Halifax house (corner of Coburg & Lemarchant) where other friends of mine lived, I found a bunch of his old junk stuffed behind the bureau mirror - poems, postcards, letters. Again I kept it all. John Stiles haunts me to this day. Tootles, Mary Beth